I never had trouble making friends but I still use to be a person pleaser, no matter how much I did not want to do something, I would do it.. I always acted nice towards a person whether I liked them or not. I praised even when I didn't want to. I never argued back with anyone, I would just get quite and not talk, and I would agree with a person even though I disagreed. I would agree so they would like me.
I was not assertive, plus I had no confidence in myself.-none, nada - I always thought everyone's ideas were better then mine or I would think they were right in what they said or right in whatever decision they made and I was wrong. ALWAYS. I never gave myself any credit and I was very hard on myself. I had no confidence in me.
One thing I knew and still do - is that I was good with hair, I was a very good hairdresser and had a great
I am a writer, but I have very little confidence in my writing. At one time a couple of years ago a person said something to me about my writing and I stopped for quite a while. I was told it was "horrible" and they did not say it in a nice way, I think that would make anyone quit trying .
It took a good year for me to slowly start to write again. It's a passion with me, but I still don't have confidence in my work. I think twice before showing it to anyone, but being in a writers group helps me to accept criticism because they are trying to help me become better.
One problem I do have is that I never had trouble speaking my mind. To this day I have to watch how I say things and even when I watch, I still say things wrong. This has caused a lot of problems for me. I realized that just because I didn't think I said anything harsh or blunt the other person thought that I did. I'm still working on that, it's a every day thing - sometimes I win and sometimes I lose - - -. I don't hear my self, maybe if I did I would know how other people hear me.
Today I still find myself trying to please people, but stop when I realize what I am doing - I sometimes still feel insecure in things I do - but I have as they say "Come A Long Way Baby"
I fought a hard battle a few years ago, the hardest battle I have ever faced and got through it. It helped strengthen me in more ways then I could ever say. but God willing I will never have to face that again.
Today, I am an assertive person, I will tell the person when I disagree with something and explain why. I now have confidence in me. I know I'm good at certain things. I'm not afraid to try new things, years ago I would panic and not even try, today I try and it usually turns out good but sometimes it doesn't. But that's OK - I don't fall apart at the seams .
As far as people, yesterday I let two people out of my life completely. And I can honestly say I feel good about it. I don't need to be around people who are negative - I want positive people around - people who laugh and have fun.
Life is to short to accept anything else.