Tuesday, June 12, 2012

GRANDMA'S & ME-MAWS

    Today I called my oldest granddaughter, I asked her what she was doing and she said " I'm working on crocheting a blanket that MeMaw with brown hair gave me." 
   She and her sisters are blessed to have three MeMaws and they all are loved very much by all three of us.
   They had just come home from spending the weekend with their MeMaw with brown hair. And then their is MeMaw from the sunny state- -  - and then there is me- MeMaw with yellow hair. yep- you read right -yellow hair (lol)
    But anyhow, I was happy for her and asked her if she could show me how to do it on Sunday when they come over and she said yes.
    After we hung up I got to thinking, her one MeMaw is good at crafts and able to take them to garage sales and swimming, the other MeMaw lives in a sunny state and has a big pool and  good at crafts also, plus they go there for two weeks in the summer and love it.
   Anyone that knows me knows that I am terrible at crafts, hate crafts and have a hard time doing it.
     But what do I do for them? Not anything really, we go to most of their soft ball games, I babysit when asked .but it is usually the little one. I don't spend quality time with any of them except the little one.
    So I was wondering what they would remember about me when I was gone, and I felt down because I can't think of anything special I do with them. 

    I have three other grandchildren who I hardly spend any time with  and they hardly ever stay over night. They are very involved with their friends and are always doing something with them.
  Anyhow, I admire these women who are able to spend quality time to do this and that with them.
  Does it make me feel better to know that I am close to ten years older then they are? No, it does not. But, I remember when I was their age I could do so much more then I can now.  Today would I be able to take all of them swimming, if it was all flat walking and not far, yes I could, walk around garage sales, - I have trouble walking period so the answer is no, nada.
    I could play cards and checkers with them but doubt if any of them would find that fun.
    I e-mailed my feelings to a good friend of mine and she sent me the following answer. She said I could use this as long as I did not use her name. I loved how she wrote this and it's to good not to share. 

Dear Dee,

    Grandmas come in all shapes, sizes and ages. My paternal grandmother was from Bohemia/Czechoslovakia. She "babysat" us kids when we were growing up. She lived a few blocks away from where we lived in Chicago. She walked to our house almost every day and even lived with us a short time...but I never really knew her. I always had the impression she didn't like us kids much. She never talked to us. I didn't even know she could speak English until several years ago when I asked my mom. How sad that grandma didn't reach out to us in some way...even if it was to tell us stories about the "Old Country" and her childhood. She passed away when she was 78 and I was 12. At age 12 I could have communicated with her but didn't. I was always afraid of her. She never hurt us but she didn't know how to reach out to us and so we kept our distance. I don't remember her ever telling me she loved me...I'm sure she didn't. I don't think the word was in her vocabulary.
   My maternal grandmother on the other hand, lived in Wis and we saw her maybe once a year and some years not at all. We loved her with abundance. She was old and poor but raised chickens and rabbits. When we went to visit she let us pet the bunnies, help feed the chickens and rabbits; we helped in the garden. She showed us newborn bunnies and newly hatched chicks or doves. I learned so much from that grandma and have so many good memories even tho she was old and couldn't play with us.

    You'll find a way...you will find something, some way to make each of them feel your love and pride in them...and that's what is really important and what they will remember. 
     (Although another memory I have of my beloved maternal grandmother was that of her chopping off the head of a chicken which was to become Sunday dinner. The chicken's head lay on the ground, eyes blinking while the body still kind of flopped around. Then there was the smell of the wet feather when grandma poured boiling water on the bird to remove the feathers. That is a smell you never forget.)

    Well, I don't have bunnies, chickens or newly hatched anything, I do have a cat who they all hate and are afraid of, that doesn't add up to any points (lol). And anyone who knows me, knows that I am terrible at crafts, hate crafts and have a hard time doing it.
    My friend did offer a suggestion that I think I will try, only if the kids and that is all 7 of them would like to do it.  And that is to do a Scrapbook,  I would like to have them, one or two at a time over to make a Scrapbook, some of them already have one or have one started, but what the heck they can always do another one--
   By the way, I told my husband how I felt and he said I will be remembered for giving them money. Men!
     If anyone who reads this has any other ideas I would appreciate hearing from you.

2 comments:

deebella said...

I visited your blog, Dee, and loved it! Your writing is open and honest. I’ll bet you talk just like you write and that’s a blessing.

I loved the blog, I wrestle with this myself. I agree with your friend, you'll find something. You're a natural at telling stories. I'm not sure how old the grandkids are, but what about reading a story together, or storytelling? All those family stories you write about are great. You could have a storytelling party, and take turns telling stories

deebella said...

A few comments of encouragement I thought I would share

Dee's shared items

SO MANY THINGS TO BE THANKFUL FOR

This time of year makes me think of all of those things I have to be thankful for - - - -
my husband
my children
my grandchildren
my health
my freedom
always thankful for friends made